A downer.

Well...My father's home town, San Pedro, Garza Garcia, Monterrey, NL, Mexico, just got named the wealthiest, richest, something or other of Latin America. Which saddens me since most of the people I know in San Pedro are not.

And tonight, Sadam was hung. I was in the same mixed up place when Pinochet died weeks ago since I cannot rejoice in anyone's death (especially one allowed by the death penalty), but what is there to feel? Apathy? I suppose it's awful knowing thats someone's attitude towards you.

hmph.

My parents are payign for high speed internet but it doesnt even work.

I have been wanting to write, btu my parents don't have high speed internet, so it's difficult to upload pics. Consequnetly, I won't write about NY and abotu seeing my lovely ebst friends, and hwo LIndsey and me threw Amanda and Brian an engagement partey, until I have the pictures to prove it!

SO a few minor updates....
1. Dad and I started the Master Cleanser today, we're only doing it for three days, but he really wanted to detox, so I am supporting, and let me tell you, it's the first time I have done this thing and not gone hungry. I actually look forward to the little lemonades I drink all day long.
2. I saw The HOliday. It was precious and I am now in love with Jude Law. That is only in jest.
3. I got a call from the ladies at the White House Project this morning and then watching the ever inspirational Mr. Obama on the tely, and am wondering if it'sa sign.
4.Diedrich's, my favorite Houston coffee shop, has been bought out, so I have been using that as an excuse to not write since I have no writing location now (I am terribl abotu writing at home.)
5. I got in a fight with my sister's boyfriend. Let me tell you....I love, I am compassionate, I care, and I RARELY get upset enough to raise my voice at someone...btu when I do.....watch out, this Taurus has got some serious horns. Especially when it comes to people I love.
6.I am reading End of Faith, and I like it but Sam Harris draws some really loose conclusions, I hope he makes up for them. I am only at the beginning, but you'd expect more meticulous work from a PHD in Philosphy. Doesn't help that I just read power of myth.
7. hmm, i have no seven, but pics and more blogging to come.

From the Hilton, Ave of the Americas, NYC, USA, N. America, the world, the galaxy, the universe, the dimmension, the string, the ...void

If LA and NYC are my zodiac signs then LA is my sun sign (the sign which gives me the tools acquired to accomplish...) and NYC is my rising, my life journey, where I am to end up.

I absolutely love this city. I cannot wait for the day I move here and live here. And I don't want to think about leaving...but I did become a member at MoMA because admission for the four of us (family) was cheaper that way, so I now I will use that as an excuse to return....I have to make use of my museum membership.

Tonight I saw Wicked, and it'd been a while since a piece of theater (no matter how broadway it may be) was sooooo inspirational. Ana Gasteyer is my new broadway idol, infact both the witches in the show....such great work. Inspires me ot start dancing again, and reminds me how excited I would get watching such reat performances, that feeling that told me to do it as long as I could. Which leads me to say.....

A director I worked with in Minnesota, who is from LA, is doing Blood Wedding in San Jose CA and has cast me as the BRIDE!!!!! First of all, Blood Wedding is one of those plays I swore I would o before I died, and now I have the female lead. I am incredibly thankful for the opportunity, and for the anticipation I now have for really working on a show again, really beign challenged, and working with a director I really work well with.

My parents are supreme. I could not have asked for better. Dad suggested we come back to NY at the end of every year as our family trip. Mom and I are gonna hold him to his word. The thing is though...its' hard now that my sister and I are older and we all want to do different things. They didnt have fun on "my day" when I chose for us to go to MoMA and hang out in Greenwich. My dad was happy taking a bus tour and visting Ground Zero. Today my sister got her shopping day, which yielded me a pair of shoes. And my mom....well I think she's happy overall, and tomorrow mornign theyre gonna try to get on the Regis and Kelly show while I go to the Guggenheim cause I know they won't want to. We have fun together, but we're all obvioiusly very different. And I of course want to go out at night, my poor sis cant since she's not21, and my parents well they don't go out like that. So last night I hung out with Amol, my new friend, and his friends and had a wonderful time partying at one of the DeLuca's (yes as in Dean and Deluca) restaurants.

As far as home goes....
I saw TV guy the night before I left. Since I left the office, he kept trying to hang out with me so finally I said ok. And I of course though it was a friendly thing after we sorta got distant with each other back at the office. We had a good time, walked to Barney's and played pool then made fun of people karaoking...and I was reminded about why I liked him....We have fun together...it's fun, and he is a nice guy. And lets just say now that I don't know how we've left it off. Things transpired, noting serious, but now I am confused as to what is going on. Ezpecially since I am still in a "I belong to God and no one else" sorta dating mood.

Ah well.
Pics from NYC to come.

Oh yeah. Amanda got engaged! (congratualtions my wittle pwetty fwend) Which means I was right. Ellie first, then Amanda, and Lindsey says she's talking about engagement with Thad. That's 3 out of 4. I am the fourth. Hah.

I'll be in NYC next week!!

i succeeded last night at making a good dinner. Let me describe:

balsamic marinated backed squash, red pepper and goat cheese stuffed mushrooms, pomegranate/cranberry/pecan mixed green salad. mmmm.

complemented by the holiday cookie Chase bought me at the play last night.

Golden Globes

The Golden Globe Nominees were announced today, and for once I think every nominee I expected was on the list (well I mean I think Gael Garcia Bernal was phenomenal in Science of Sleep but I also knew he wouldnt get nominated.) But both Brad Pitt, and the Hispanic lady in Babel were nominated....thank goodness. Aso Borat was nominated for best comedy as was Sacha Baren Cohen. Little Miss Sunshine got some nominations as well as the breathtaking Penelope Cruz in Volver. Weeds and Grey's Anatomy were also on the list.

Points of DissaPOINTment:

Apocalypto was nominated as a best foreign film. (YUCK, A stupid racist movie., or so I read in reviews....we'll see.)

Beyonce was nominated for Dreamgirls, which I hear is a great film and I can't wait to see it, but I also heard from Justin how her part in the original cut was smaller, but they wanted to make her into a nominee and seem like a lead actress so they extended her scenes even though jennifer hudson had the larger role, and the fact that Hollywood PR people could actually affect something like the Golden Globe nominations is rather upsetting though to be expected.)

And then America, the girl not the country, gets nominated for Ugly Betty, yeah yeah, I watch the show, it's cute, and cheesy, and has some greta actors like the girl who plays her enemy, and her boyfriend and her sister, but I think she's , well and "...
-eh" kind of actor, but I am VERY hard on her because when I have an agent she'll be my competition, and her nomination REALLY makes me want to get off my butt and get one ASAP before she goes and wins that thing. Yes, I admit I am childishly jealous. I am sure she's a nice girl.

Xochiquetzal

My new life as a shaman.

I have just failed at my first attempt to make a Spanish tortilla (egg-potato pie.) I am definitely no Dana, and perhaps I shouldve followed Lauras adviced to cook the potatos in chicken broth first, but nope. It ended up being a a huge omelette, of which half ended up on my stove top during the tricky flipping technique it takes to make a tortilla.

I can't take any pictures for you because I have lost BOTH battery chargers to my Canon Elf, so if anyones thinking of a clever and thoughtful holiday gift to send me......

I have been reading Joseph Campbell, a good book to come into my hands at this point in my life. I oscillate between being caught in though, in ideas, and being set into action, work. And for a while I was stuck in action, action, action. And right now I am in a place of ideas, idealogy, idealism. I catch myself worrying sometimes that I am not doing enough, making things happen (though I am doing quite a but i fyou know me you know I never think it's enough). But I remind myself how much I need these periods of wallwoing in thought to ground myself in my beliefs, my idealogy, my passions, my mind, my spirit. Its in these periods of time that I want to just continue my life as an artist forever, become a scholar, teach, write, speak. Its the times of incessant action that throw me into desires of running for office, taking off for africa to hold children, starting organizations to help immigrants. The peak of my life will be when I have found a way to live my life doing both at once, in a balance. That is the point I want to reach-the point of the most complete me.

Campbell says that artists are the shamans of our age. In my periods of "take action" I often feel like my art is not enough, that it's not actively "doing" anything. But I like this idea that artists revitalize a society with the "mythology" it easily loses, and with the meanings and inspirations found therein. I am going to live in pride as an artist (pride being the un-humble happiness_ because I need to go to that extreme to once again appreciate what it is to live and breath and walk and talk and create as an artist.

Last week I started painting again....I'm no Da Vinci, (though I dream to be), but I finally let myself just do it.

Sure Enough...

I had another dream last time...this time with certain famiyl members who always comment on my weight, but now I got to tell them to shut it. Perhaps my brain is draining of the negativity.

I feel a bit blocked. I feel like my voice is being choked and my brushes lost their bristles.

And Guy #4 had now DIVORCED me...three times he said.

Les Reves Interessantes.

Okay, so dreams.....

Two nights ago, I had a dream about my ex roomate, Megan, whom I havent' spoken to since I confronted her about a years worth of issues, but mainly that she went behind my back and did some shady business regarding my deposit and the management company. Though I have tried to contact her, I have had no response, but int his dream I was making peace with her. And it wasn't just about me, she was speaking back and giving her side....and I mean really. I mean in my dream I would assume that her responses would be things I wanted to hear or that I fabricated, but no, she was responding. I didn't think anything of it until last night I had a dream about someone I worked with at the TV company, with whom I had several little confrontations. And though she and I are fine, and thing were left fine, in my dream we talked through it all, and I mean really. She gave me her arguments back, and I explained myself, and it's almost as if for the past two nights my spirit has been trying ot make peace with issues even I though I thought the peace was made. Who will show up tonight?

Could Powder be my cousin?

I was planning on having my first "video blog" post today, so instead of just reading me, you can hear me, but somehow I have lost both battery chargers to my camera battery. I am sure they are to be found under the heaps of clothing in my bedroom, or some other sureptitious corner. So instead, with the little battery power I had, I took some shots of what i would have looked like talking to you. Enjoy.
Theses days have been incredibly synchronisish. I know that may not be a word, but in the world of my blog I have just coined in and now can be used freely by those who wish. By synchronisish, I am referring the synchronicity Carl Jung Style, or if you've learned it the way Plato would've hated...through The Artist's Way, then Julia Cameron Style, and by it I mean what many may call coincidental, God imposed/inspired, magical, crazy, typical, whatever. The point is this week has shown me somethins is going on with me, and I won't be so arrogant as to say that I am a magical or chosen human being (though that's what I think ;-)) but that perhaps I am becoming more atune with the things happening around me, and thank goodness because they have been for my benefit.

Well it hasn't just been this week, but lately in general. Such as how I met Micah while volunteering for the Dems, and immediately he said....I want to help you, I am going to connect you with so and so. And he did connect me with a new friend who is also helping me however he can in the industry. And no, my new friend is not romantic. Then on Sunday, I was sitting enjoying breakfast at Whole Foods when a guy comes up to me ( and I had felt his presence before in the line, in other words, I knew he was there) to sit and talk, and it was obvious he was no good at doing that, or that he was trying extract anything from me other than to listen. So he calls me yesterday to set up a tea rendez-vous today, and says, I don't knwo why I was drawn to you but I think I want to help you. You mentioned you were classically trained so I am hooking you up with so and so who's a director and perhaps she can help. So we met, and not only do I find him really interesting, and in the cast of my life I was missing someone just like him, but for some wierd reason, he feels drawn to help me.

At this point you're all thinking...watch out claudia, everyone wants something from someone, you might get hurt, ofcourse they want something from you....Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have taken that into consideration, but I mean Micah moved away to Massachusetts, and John, yeah he's totally not into me, I doubt I am his type at all. Believe me if you knew him you'd know, that we could be friends, but our lives are not criss crossy at all.


Some other crazy things are that last night my friend tells me he felt my shadow, around the time he was on my mind (in the evening), and then also this week, honest to God, I had been thinking about another dear friend and how i need to get in touch with him and lo and behold, he writes me today to tell me he had a dream of me. ( Boys I hope you don't mind me telling your stories.) I mean it helps that those two friends I consider kindred spirits, or spirit friends, or in other words friends who I connect with on a deeper level..


And today, on my way to meeting John at Elixir(what a beautifully peacefull garden), a woman stopped me right at a corner as i crossed the street, and asked me to interpret to these Mexican women who were cleaning homes. The woman wanted to hire them. As I was finishing, she looks in my eyes and says I sense lots going on with you energetically. Something's going on with you, and I said, really? Cause it has been....

I dunno, those aren't the only things, but there's something in the air. And John said he's felt it too, and he's an intuitive energetic healer. Sounds out there, but if you've ever had cranial sacral therapy thats what it is, and I had it in London at the National Theater Studio...pretty awesome.

Don't be surprised if tomorrow I am teleporting through space.

This is a blog test

I jsut want to make sure the reason my blog is down is not something serious, lately i have been told it is not accessible. i will write soon...when life slows down.