Why's it always gotta be black...chocolate chips.

I cleaned the flat! Woohoo! Even the tub, and the toilet, and changed my sheets (to my red ones now. several hundred count egyptian), and hung up my clothes, thank goodness. BUt that wasn't the only highlight. This morning I went to BRUNCH with some new friends, and met their little girl, Piper, who was a cutey, making sure she let me know all the spanish words she knew. And then came home, did my BUSINESS, and took myself to DINNER AND A MOVIE (I'd really missed my single dates, especially my lone-movie dates, a liking which I get from my father) I saw Thank You for Smoking- very funny, I'm no good at writing film reviews, nor do I think my opinion would matter in your movie choice, but if you want to see one, it's a good time. Afterward I hung out with Toussaint... we baked COOKIES, chocolate caramel chip cookies.

I dont' know why I keep hanging with that kid. I always leave him feeling frustrated, well for a while, and then I get over it, cause his stupidities are really easy to disregard. Perhaps its the challenge of the constant negotiations while being in his presence. Perhaps I am attracted to his strange energy that I dont get from the typical minnesotan ineteraction, and not attraction like, ooh i like him, because I definitely dont thats fo sho, but just a simple I-need-to-get-worked-up, and he does it with that arrogant smirk of his. Perhaps its the challenges of breaking through the wall he erects five minutes into us hanging out when het starts getting comfortable and more open around me, when, good lord, I wish he would trust me. I have no idea why he takes me so seriously or why he takes everything I say so personally or why he thinks everything I do resonates in the world as a sell-out-to-the-white-man-move. I mean all I said was, wow, those will be big cookies. Sometimes cookies are just gonna be big, and it has nothing to do with race.

Talk about people with draining energy.

Everything is just a moment in the woods.

Yeah, Toussaint already teased me about being home on a Saturday night, but I have felt under the weather lately, and if you know what the weather's been like here that's pretty "under," and after doing a whole show feeling nauseated onstage, and then calling Pete to tell him I wouldn't be going to see his band play at the Fine Line like I'd been saying I would after he got me tickets and all, and then ending up at TownHall with Nora, Seth, and Brian ( a sweet surprise.), home sounded so nice, and my bed does too.

I got a pedicure today, and they dipped my feet in extremely hot wax, and the lady took out all my knots, and then tickled me silly with the buffer, and still, hours later, from wearing shoes in the show, the polish got all screwed up.There goes the ped...

For those close friends who know what I have been going through this past week, haha, I believe it's over, I feel hmmm ....better, and Amanda...thanks for the consolation.

Favorite Moments of the Day: Just now, Toussaint calling me drunk again, for like the fifth time after telling me again that he'll call me tomorrow. haha, our conversation at Town Hall about crabs, and Nora turning to Seth to ask "do crabs jump." SETH: How would I know?!!, Getting to know Brian a little better, the ass kicking Morris gave us in African Dance, walking back home in the rain singing my favorite rainy day song( Isn't it a lovely day to be caught in the rain, you were going on your way....), The ladies at the nail place laughing at me squirm when they tortured me with wax, a surprise cup of tea with a friend, The guy in the audience who kept talking at us (That's ridiculous! Who is that, hahaha thats the mother, did you see that, hahah it was her mother.) Nora's reaction to my footwear, haha, and many more, what a life.

Amaryah leaves...

Check out href="http://www.paulgregoryphotography.com">Paul Gregory's Website<\a>. He's the photographer taking my LA photos. Apparently he shot pics for Jesus and Amber from Clueless.

Last night brought on feelings of deep nostalgia. Amaryah is moving to Chicago, as is Harmony in August, and last night was her last mini-concert at EP Atelier Coffee Shop. I hadn't seen them in months, and now they're leaving. I remember first meeting them when they came to see my show with Susie. And the night we were sitting outside of Cafetto and witnessed the shooting at the Superamerica. ANd making dinner for them, the night i realized Adam was annoying the shit out if me.





I believe I am pretty good at handling loss. I always seem to be going somewhere, moving somewhere, leaving people. These past months though, it seems as if everyone has been leaving. And in the coming months more will too, including me. Ibanga moves to India mid June, Will is leaving on a spiritual retreat.

Alison left last week. I remember when we'd go to the West Bank skyway on our Theatre History break and buy the little holiday toys. That one crazy night at Drink where we hung out with those nice guys.


Before that, Matt moved to Chicago. I didn't even get to see him.


Before that Betsy moved to LA. I will see her soon. Betsy and I have some good memories. Like our little Stratford Upon Avon trip in England. And shopping for her, ahem, Bday present, and how I am her little kitty, Pheobe's, Spirit/God mother even though I am allergic to her.


Before that, Susie moved to LA, will see her soon too. I remember Susie visiting me with Adam and bringing over large chunks of Wuollet's Princess Torte and Chocolate torte when she learned I broke up with Adam, and the day I helped her load the LA truck up.


Then Adam moved before she moved. Aah, Adam, who always played my brother or lover or son in the BFA plays. Adam who shared soynuts with me in Plant Propagation, and Adam who really was like my brother.(Susie and me both dated Adams. This one belonged to her.)

And the list of movers goes on and on. I am thankful that no one has left me by way of death yet. I don't even want to think about ever losing my father. The man was on an airplane 9/11 morning.

Spending time with Harm and Am reminded me of the person I'd forgotten I was. I am bringing her back, and even though it may not be outwardly noticeable, I will be aware.

Sick. I think.

I don't feel well today. I just want to sleep and rest.
I feel yuck, and under the weather, and ick, and all those sicky things.
I need love and nurturing but my parents are in Mexico, and I can't even get a hold of my mom to have her make me feel better.
Ay.

Up and over...

Good show today. Haha. Mark and I were doing something, but I will tell you, it wasn't what is written, I am sure the interpreters had a good time trying to do the show in sign language. The people obviously liked it, they kept clappign after every scene.

And then me, Mark and Nora went to the Times for drinks and our waitress asks me "Hey are you an actress? Are you in that Marta show!" and I said yes we all are! She had seen the show the night before, so we of course, felt like stars. I have to admit, being noticed feels pretty neat.

I was hoping to write about Cleveland and Dallas' CD release party tonight, at the Dakoda, but I missed it cause the show ended too late.

Nice tame salsa night, though, and I got to see Brynn, who I love seeing. And I also saw my new French friend Sebastien( Seh-Bas-tyon) who I met last week. I still smell like him, since I danced with him last. Good thing he smells good. I can't figure him out. He waited till the very end of the night to ask me to dance, while he kept dancing with this other lady, but took me outside to talk a bit, and then asked to see me this week right before I left, while we kept trying to figure out what cultures kisses to late (mexico = one kiss on the cheek, France=two, one on each). We've emailed last week, and I am fascinated by anything foreign (hehe, most my friends know this, plus I am learning French and he said he would help, between his giggles at the little French that I showed him I knew.)




Nora and I were laughing at this man we called the slider, because instead of picking up his feet and doing the salsa step, he slid around, and got all sweaty, and made these funny faces when dancing with us. These are our impressions of his faces...




Mr. Hobart was a poop and didnt come out tonight, or answer his door when I went to bother him post dancing and a few drinks. :-) bless him, he actually has a job. Unlike me.

Just joking, I worked all day today, and I have a show at 830 am. so this is me "up and over", as my dad would say, when trying to say "over and out."

eh, nothing big.

A tiring day, and the first of many until the middle of May.
Today's Highlights:
1. Being flung around the room in Breaking Ice rehearsal while reciting poetry.
2. Hanging out in the basement at Shish with the electricians, and learning a little something something about their job. Inluding that the craziest place theyve worked at was a rendering plant, where they send dead animals to become dog food and belts.

3. Leo buying me a cookie and then realizing that I met the coffee shop guy when he saw my show last week.
4. Talking to mom.
5. Eating the rest of my Wagamama soup.
6. Talking to Rachel on IM.
7. Typical sarcastic, funny, somewhat wierd conevrsation with Touissant on the phone (dang it I missed Slam night tonight.)
8. Finally wiritng something.
9. SPending time with Alison at Lyle's, her last night in town.





10. Hanging with The Charles.
11. My before bed routine, done slowly and carefully, as I peacefully make it into the bed I made earlier today when I finally cleaned up.

Oh yeah, I told Alberto I would put his picture up. This way you know who the ladies man is... SO here...

Wagamama and Smartwater.

I cooked tonight. Yep, I did. It forced me to do the dishes. I tried to copy my favorite dish at Wagamama in London, and it actually worked. Dana, this blog is for you, since you are the queen of talking about recipes in the blog (and blogs in general for that matter.), so here goes...

I made a broth and threw in some ginger, garlic, and Sake. Then I cooked spinach, snap peas, sprouts, shitake mushrooms, and green onion in it. Added some curly asian noodles, and low sodium soy sauce and voila! It tasted exactly like the Super Wagamama meal I so dearly miss. I don't know if I can reproduce it, as I just threw stuff in without measuring. We'll see.

Also, today at my Playwright's Roundtable, Harry Waters (known to most of you as the guy in Back to the Future 1 and 2 who cuts his hand opening the trunk, and who is in the band at the dance) was acting like a sass factory. Well, so was I for some reason. I had bought a huge liter of Smart Water and he insisted that it was Smart Ass Water, in reference to my sassy tongue, the whole time.
He also suggested I fix my writer's block by just writing some place different, like the IDS tower. HAHA, I Am thinking something more like another country.
I told him I would stick myself somewhere and see whatever comes out. Haha, can you imagine his response.
Here's a link to my show's review in the Star Trib. It's a good one.
http://www.startribune.com/121/story/390379.html
And here are some more Toledo pics, since Dan liked them so much...


Dan and Laura vogue-ing at the Fundacion.

Me and Papa Vazquez at a Bull fight (Corrida de Toros) in Madrid.

Dad walking down the street in Toledo by where I lived. The street Dan helped me stumble down that very funyn night when Cubalibres had no Coke.

Claudia is a Good Speller, She Just Types Badly...

some weekend stuff

SO I didn't mention this yesterday, cause it seemed insignificant until today. But while I was waiting for Beth in Avalon, next to shish, I noticed this guy in the store, we looked up at the same time and caught each other's eye, and kept doing the whole look and turn away and smile thing; there was something siezing about the moments we caught each other's gaze. Then he left, after looking back one more time, until I saw him again out the window of Shish, since he was getting into his car which had been parked right outside Shish's window, and we caught each other's eyes again, through the window, and kept looking back and smiling, and by this time it was like I knew him, he seemed familiar. Then he drove off as I had to get into a car as well. Those moments were satisfying enough, but I did wish something had happened, I mean, he was just like what I like (physically), tall, defined chiseled features, a kind smile, and intense, complex eyes. And it seemed his pharamones had matched up with mine. I forgot about it until today I kept thinking I was seeing him around. I really hope I run into him on Grand by chance, some day....Aaah, I am such a daydreamer, but siezing moments of connection like those make me miss significant and passionate connections with people, like....

Like I had with my beautiful friends in Toledo. Bejota( BJ) came to my show on Friday, and I was instantly reminded of the ole days of Spain. Here are some Spain Memories....




Speaking of the show, I think there was a critic in the audience today.
Last night was our director's last night in town before he headed out to LA, so I met up with the cast at Nye's after watching a very long but Beautiful Floyd Collins at the Loring Playhouse (it's about a guy who gets stuck in a cavern, and guess what, he dies, but that took 2.5 hours to happen!). At Nye's, which reminded me of Las Vegas, we had a little fun and also I sang "Fever" accompanied by the old lady playing the piano, which led to some old men feeling on my leg as I walked back to the table. Nice, that's the way to get a girl...



Then met up with dancing machines John, Angela, and Charles at Nochee (on International Night) and we partied. John and Angela called it a night before C and me; we stayed up longer for some more fun...





Today after the show, went to a BBQ otu in the middle of nowhere MN, I mean past Lakeville, what is that? but met lots of great people. Conversation about 9/11:
Me: Yeah, if I was on that flight, I would probably have used my Wi-fi on the iBook to hack into the plane controls, or send messages and stuff.
Guy: Yeah, like, Hey we're being hi-jacked, LOL.

Night ended with wathcing Inside Man with Toussaint. Toussaint, what a character. Talk about a strange energy between people. I wouldnt be surprised if what he said actually happens: after these two months of hanging out, we will probably never speak to each other again.

Good Saturday

Today I picked up a new hobby sort of- table top decorating. I am doing the tables for my friend Leo's new Middle Eastern Restaurant Shish, on Grand in Saint Paul.

Yesterday, we opened Ten Percent of Marta Solano, and despite the fact that I got a super bad foot cramp in my right foot right after the second scene(there are 6 scenes), we made it through. It's those darn flat shoes that don't match my arch, but anyhow, I foudn times in the play where I could sit down adn massage the foot. Speaking of massage, at the Opening Night Reception, a woman came up to me to tlak to me about how much she liked the show. She went away and came back about three times before she finally told me, Look I am a rolfer, and I am booked through August but I will get you in for a session, that will be my gift to you for the show. I could not believe her generosity! Considering one rolfing session is usually 150-200 bucks an hour, and really hard to book. And the great part is I have been wanting to get rolfed. Now that it is a possibility, the pain it will cause me is starting to make me nervous, though.

Dinner with Jack was a pleasure as well. I am thakful for all the work he has gotten me, and for really supporting me in my career here in teh cities.

Here are some pics of us last night as La Bodega celebrating Desmin's BDay.

Times at the Times.

Another fabulous night at the Times, dancing with Nora. It was a good one, got to dance with some good dancers, but it was really humid, so most of the time I was gross and sticky.

There was this one guy who looked so familiar, and then I finally realized who he was when I was dancing with him. See my friend Victor used to play with Salsa del Sol, the band, and so about a year ago I went to listen to him play, and met Adam, who would be my "boyfriend" (when I look back he wasnt so much a boyfriend, but a steady dating thing, hmph.), but he and I were really engaged in talking with each other, until that same guy asked me to dance, a year ago. Luckily it was while I was dancing with that kid that Adam asked my friend Sarah if I was available and stuff, and the story goes from there. This time however there was no guy I wanted to return to. I just wanted to stop dancing with him, that same familiar guy, cause i kept getting hurt, and he hurt a woman too.

But I enjoyed his friend Sebastian who's from France, but came to study at the U years ago. And if you don't already know, I am learning French, and he agreed to help me with the pronunciation and conversational aspects. Also, I danced with him, and phew! could he dance. There's something so attractive about a man who can move to Latin music.

I hear a ringing in my years.

Also, had our Preview for the show tonight. It went reaaaally well. People actually liked it. I mean alot. So come to my SHOW! www.mixedblood.com. It's pretty funny.


Here's Thibault and AC my French friends who taught me how to say je vous tu voir plus souvent.

And for memory's sake, here's Adam and Sarah BFF, post salsa dancing meeting, pre-thank-goodness-break-up.

Bad luck. Or Good?

I have the worst luck with machines. I went outside this morning only to discover some idiot smashed my sideview mirror. Then all of a sudden there appears a huge crack on the screen of my iBook, and haven't even dropped this one, like i dropped the other one ten biollion times before it broke.

But here is where my luck changed. My mom's crazy jefa(boss) has been trying to buy this HM shirt all over the country so since there is no HM in Houston, she had me buy it for her here, cool thing was that she let me buy something too.

Check out my play!
Ten Percent of Marta Solano.

Steve is Safe and Sound!

I woke up up last night to a phone call, it was Steve, who I had been trying to get a hold of for months.
I thought something crazy happened to him or something, since he is in the Navy now that he's out of college, and was NROTC then.
But no, he called me from somewhere in the Pacific while on a secret mission- scary- but I am very glad to know he's still around; though I wish he was still in Corpus, safe and sound in TX.
However, it turns out he will be heading out to Iraq eventually.

I met Steve yeeeears ago, when we both did Presidential Classroom in DC. Ha, that was a good summer. That was the summer I was Miss Teen Bellaire in the Miss Teenage Texas Scholarship Pageant.

And I remember him being very funny, telling this story about some Scottish Man, and the reason his screen name is... oops, i won't give you that. I also remember after we left DC, getting a postcard from him in the mail all the way from Italy, while he was on tour with a band.
And I remember how he talked to my mom on the phone, and how they got along so well when he visited me in Houston (They share a common Bond, haha that was punny, what I mean is they talked about Stocks the whole time).
She asks about him alot, now I can say where he is, sorta of, since he's on a secret mission he can tell me nothing about, cause he's dealing with the the big kids.

Mr. Steve. Unfortunately long-distance, but one of my favorite long distance friendships. And i think, maybe even at this point, the longest.

I have been accepted to the White House Project Training! WIth a scholarship!

And a little update on that kid I met salsa dancing... He's clever, he gave me his home phone number, because he probably knew i wouldnt answer if i saw his name on the phone. So he called me from his cell phone yesterday to ask me out. But the turh is, I rarely answer my phone anyway, and his dumb butt told me this number on my phone was his cell number, so i now i knwo the other number no to answer, he's clever and persistent. But when it's just not there, it's not.

Je vais au cafe maintenant.

A Few more things...

On the way to Origami with Ibanga, we saw a guy whip it out and pee on the side of the road, all out in the open.
We went to Origami because I was hungry, and ALberto suggested that way significant enough to put in my blog.
Alberto is my best Lebanese friend, and Ladies Man, as I hired him months ago, the night he ate an entire bag of radishes.
I guess he was hungry. Cleveland is coming over to visit tonight, oops, there he is, calling to come up, so bye.

Moments of Last Week and Runs.

Above you see lots of stuff, Me and Pete on our way to the Fine Line to see Jack's band play. Nate being silly whilst cooking Egyptian Food, or making Turkish Coffee, something....Me and Larissa's beautiful boy, Kade, (the Bean), Me and Nick at Christinas bday dinner at Azia, hmm what else, oh yes, and Toussaint in my "accessories" at Espresso Expose, I dunno if I left any thing out... Today was beautiful, had myself a run around the lake, and had a good run through of our show this morning, aaaah, we open Friday!

Las Muchachas necesitan espacio.

I really love my London girls, not only do they recall a memory and feeling from my London Wonder days, but I love that they are such strong intelligent women who can party. And they are fluent in Spanish! So, ofcourse, going out dancing last night with them was worth it, even after a full evening at my Tech rehearsal. Why are guys soo agressive on Salsa nights? I think they have learned that they have to be, because Salsa nights are for dancing and so they have to rbeak out of their boxes in order to ask a girl to dance to begin with, so now they have evolved into a species of man and that not only asks a girl to dance, but immediately asks her for their number, asks them on a date, or proposes (not seriously of course). Unfortunately for them, I have evolved into a woman who will let them know if she's interested, who will ask them out if thats what she wants. I have to give this one guy credit, I don't remember his name, but he kept asking me out, after trying to be all romantic and nice (which he was), but I kept giving him the honest answers of no, maybe i will think about hanging out with you, and i really amnot interested in finding romance right now, I moving away, I am too busy etc.. Nonetheless he kept at it ( and he was cute, except I am not really attracted to Latin American Guys in that way.) and eventually got my number. I can assure you nothing will come of it, because I did not approach him- so he should've gotten the picture, but no.

You know what does break my heart, meeting these guys when I am dancing, and they ask me where I am from, so I say Texas, and then they ask where my family's from and I tell them my parents are straight from Mexico, and then they respond with "So you've got papers!," It also breaks my heart that they all come here family-less and work in construction, and are still willing to buy me and Jen Water. Which makes me wonder about the guys who respond to my being from Texas with, So you're not really Mexican. Well, for heaven's sake! If I am not American, and not Mexican, what in the world am I? I will tell you, lucky to not be an immigrant in this country these days. But still inspired by Ivan's story...

Jen met Ivan when we were at Conga, and he bought us water and talked to us about crossing the border, riding trains through the desert, hiking food and waterless in the desert, until finally making it here. I asked him if it was worth it, he said yes. Even though he left his family behind, and the only possessions he brought were the clothes on his body. And like many immigrants, he has a degree in his country but is now laying roofs.

Regardless, Like Jen said, Las Muchachas necesitan espacio, We girls need space when we dance, so we will continue to respond to the guys agressive tactics with our agressive tongues, all for the sake of a good night of dancing.

Late Night With Me.

I was really not in the mood to socialize tonight, especially after a five hour rehearsal 6-10 pm, and a full day in general, but I went to Allison, Alison, and Emily's last 2121 Bryant Party anyway because it was the last one. Only I saw some people I wasn't in the mood to handle, and that was awkward, and My cat allergies kicked in, and I was updated on my ex- well whatever, looking back i wouldn't call him my boyfriend, but ex-something, and honestly I did not want to be updated on him.

But ofcourse, my dear friend Ibanga helped me laugh about it all.

Today I also applied for The White House Project's weekend of training, for women interested in running for office. I have a strong feeling I will be admitted, but we'll see. The more I think about it, and even the more I allow my self to be open to noticing opportunities and opening doors I have a feeling my life will head down that road a lot sooner than expected.

We'll see, after tomorrow, well this morning, when I meet with Cathy- a casting director from LA.

P/S I love my father, who left me a message today pretending to be a fillm director looking for an actress for a film, i perhaps would have believed him if it wasnt for his accent, and the giggle at the end.

The Next Level

I went to Bikram Yoga today I finally touched my forehead to the floor during the standing separate leg pose. I cannot explain the joy I got from the compression of forhead and mat; I was happy to be make yoga progress even though I hadn't been back in almost two weeks. I also decided to go half naked, like most of the yogis do, since you sweat the whole class, and that of course took me to another level of self love and acceptance, regarding my body. I say another level because I have already been on that path, but staring at yourself in a mirror, all sweaty, in twisty positions... yeah, that takes you to that next level.

Speaking of next levels...

Andrew is back in the picture, sorta. He comes and goes these days. If you don't know, Andrew is the guy I met when I lived in London two and half years ago. We kept in touch for two years, always dodging the we-like-each-other-but-dont-want-to say-it issue until last summer when we finally confessed it all and decided to try a more than friends long distance thing. So in November I went to visit him and I discovered I was unsure about the whole thing, and he freaked out on me as well. No big deal, I met my new French friends AC and hot-stuff-Thibault and hung with them, but then Andrew and I didnt speak again, until he started calling me again in January saying he still wanted me. So we had a conversation and decided to hold onto each other until some day when perhaps we are in the same city again or decide to move, if we still feel the same. And now, I hear from him every so often, and I get all confused. I talked to him yesterday and the day before. I just dont know. It's as if I know him, well this idea i have in my head of him that I have sculpted out of the few memories i have of him, phone and email conversations, but then there are times I feel so distant from him (well, duh, we are on separate continents). I know that I have never felt so wanted by someone else, and I have never desired someone as much as him; in fact, sometimes I intuit that we'll end up together...and that scares me.

I did it again....

Despite the fact that I have a neglected blog on Xanga, I decided to start a new one, seeing as my friends seem to be using blogspot lately instead. Really it's just adding another thing for me to do, when I really I should be doing other things, but whatever....It'll be a good way to ensure I stay in people's lives once I move to Los Angeles. I seem to blog more often right before I move somewhere; so this is no surprise :-).

And since I have stopped journalling, I have wanted to begin again, but this is 2006 so who needs pen and paper.

So, having said that, or written, or typed (I love the 2000's), here I go....